Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Howdy Partner!
Just back in the saddle from a trip to Columbia, MO for the first session in a series called Partners In Policymaking. An eight month segue of classes put on by the Missouri Developmental Disabilities Council, (formerly the Missouri Planning Council for Developmental Disabilities), to train people to advocate for others with disabilities.
Participants are by selection and are people with disabilities or parents of kids with disabilities. It was an eye opening experience and I learned a lot not just from the great lineup of presenters who came to share stories and insight, but also from the diverse group of participants there to be educated. I also learned a lot from myself as I had to sleep and shower in a room with someone I had never met before. Out of all the valuable information garnered from that weekend, the most humbling piece I came back with is how much I have yet to learn about life in general. I used to think I knew everything too. Just ask my family.
Anyway, it was a two day boatload of information to process with tons of practical info to pass along. Common sense stuff that somehow falls by the wayside for a lot of us, me included. I will be sharing lessons from those two days over the course of time, but one that stands out prominently and needs immediate attention is "People First!"
I am extremely embarrassed to say as someone who endeavors to promote inclusion and diversity, I had never heard this term before in the context it was used. People first. People are people first. Some people have disabilities but their disability is not who they are. It is just one of the attributes of their person and does not define them. This is all true and what it boils down to is we need to quit stereotyping.
First of all, let's get this straight. I am not talking about listening to music at high decibels while typing on a computer. I do that all the time. I am referring to the BAD habit of attaching labels to people. Labels emit images in people's minds.
Examples:
The Irish actor that plays in those movies...(A roguish character actor potraying Irish speaking film, stage or TV roles).
The crippled girl at school...(A sickly, pathetic sounding female figure; a morbid individual, roaming the halls of school with a ball and chain rattling behind her).
I once read that Cillian Murphy, the actor, doesn't like to be referred to as an Irish actor. Even though he was born and raised in Ireland, it makes sense if you think about it; he doesn't want to be stereotyped in his work. He is not ashamed of his Irish heritage, but he doesn't want to be identified solely by that attribute of his person. If he marketed himself as "the Irish actor, Cillian Murphy", casting agents and directors might think the only roles he could play would be those of Irish men, and that is not the case with him at all. Although he does have a very heavy Irish accent and can play Irish characters very well, he speaks fluent French and can mimic a great American dialect no problemo. As a result he is a much sought after actor and has had great success portraying a wide array of diverse characters--not just one. He is a person first, with many talents and traits, and that is how he wants to be known.
Cillian Murphy: he is an actor, from Ireland. If you don't know who he is, he's the guy who played Scarecrow in Batman Begins. Yep, that's him. Dr Crane. Bet you couldn't even hear his Irish accent in that movie!
The same goes for people with disabilities. People have names first and that is how they want to be recognized. NOT like in the following fictional example of dialogue between a couple planning a birthday party for their school aged child and her classmates.
"Is that everybody? Hmm...Hmm...Hmm...Who else is there? Oh yeah...what's her name...the handicapped kid?...You know...the little crippled girl?....The one with special needs?!! What's her name? You've seen her. The one with the walker! What's wrong with her, again?...Is she retarded?... "
"Oh, I can't remember...I don't know what's wrong with her. Oh...are you sure? Should we invite her to the skating party for little Lulu? She doesn't fit in with the other kids. Maybe we shouldn't. She'll never know."
"No. I guess not. What would she do anyway? Besides that, Lulu might catch what she's got!"
A sad story indeed. This one has a better ending:
"Hey, you know who we forgot!?! Phoebe! What about Phoebe?"
"Oh my, garsh! How could we forget Phoebe!!! What were we thinking!?! Although... wait a minute...is she going to be able to participate in the skating part of the party? Remember... she has some special gear so I don't know how well that will work for her with skates."
"You're right. Maybe we should come up with a different party idea so she can participate too? She might feel funny sitting on the sidelines watching everyone else whizz by while she just sits there. She might get lonely!"
"We can't leave her out, the kids love her!!! Hey! I know! What about that new cupcakery around the corner?!"
"Awesome! I love it! Great idea! This is going to be a blast!"
The little "crippled" girl: A figment of the couples imagination who never materialized because she was forgotten. The parent's antiquated and archaic attitudes, language and actions toward others with disabilities her kept her weak and pathetic in their minds so they never allowed their little Lulu to be near her. The family never fully matured. The little girl on the other hand, is doing quite well...
Meet Phoebe (pronounced fee bee): A female with a congenital physical disability. It's nothing contagious, it's something she was born with, like her brown hair. With her mobility equipment at the ready, she's a girl on the go and always up for adventure. She doesn't let anything hold her back from having a great time! It's the WAY she is, not the "what" she is that makes this square bee stand out from the crowd! psst...(She reminds me a lot of my daughter!)
Stereotyping is what is wrong! It is detrimental to social development and holds people back. Don't let it happen in your household!
Participants are by selection and are people with disabilities or parents of kids with disabilities. It was an eye opening experience and I learned a lot not just from the great lineup of presenters who came to share stories and insight, but also from the diverse group of participants there to be educated. I also learned a lot from myself as I had to sleep and shower in a room with someone I had never met before. Out of all the valuable information garnered from that weekend, the most humbling piece I came back with is how much I have yet to learn about life in general. I used to think I knew everything too. Just ask my family.
Anyway, it was a two day boatload of information to process with tons of practical info to pass along. Common sense stuff that somehow falls by the wayside for a lot of us, me included. I will be sharing lessons from those two days over the course of time, but one that stands out prominently and needs immediate attention is "People First!"
I am extremely embarrassed to say as someone who endeavors to promote inclusion and diversity, I had never heard this term before in the context it was used. People first. People are people first. Some people have disabilities but their disability is not who they are. It is just one of the attributes of their person and does not define them. This is all true and what it boils down to is we need to quit stereotyping.
First of all, let's get this straight. I am not talking about listening to music at high decibels while typing on a computer. I do that all the time. I am referring to the BAD habit of attaching labels to people. Labels emit images in people's minds.
Examples:
The Irish actor that plays in those movies...(A roguish character actor potraying Irish speaking film, stage or TV roles).
The crippled girl at school...(A sickly, pathetic sounding female figure; a morbid individual, roaming the halls of school with a ball and chain rattling behind her).
I once read that Cillian Murphy, the actor, doesn't like to be referred to as an Irish actor. Even though he was born and raised in Ireland, it makes sense if you think about it; he doesn't want to be stereotyped in his work. He is not ashamed of his Irish heritage, but he doesn't want to be identified solely by that attribute of his person. If he marketed himself as "the Irish actor, Cillian Murphy", casting agents and directors might think the only roles he could play would be those of Irish men, and that is not the case with him at all. Although he does have a very heavy Irish accent and can play Irish characters very well, he speaks fluent French and can mimic a great American dialect no problemo. As a result he is a much sought after actor and has had great success portraying a wide array of diverse characters--not just one. He is a person first, with many talents and traits, and that is how he wants to be known.
Cillian Murphy: he is an actor, from Ireland. If you don't know who he is, he's the guy who played Scarecrow in Batman Begins. Yep, that's him. Dr Crane. Bet you couldn't even hear his Irish accent in that movie!
The same goes for people with disabilities. People have names first and that is how they want to be recognized. NOT like in the following fictional example of dialogue between a couple planning a birthday party for their school aged child and her classmates.
"Is that everybody? Hmm...Hmm...Hmm...Who else is there? Oh yeah...what's her name...the handicapped kid?...You know...the little crippled girl?....The one with special needs?!! What's her name? You've seen her. The one with the walker! What's wrong with her, again?...Is she retarded?... "
"Oh, I can't remember...I don't know what's wrong with her. Oh...are you sure? Should we invite her to the skating party for little Lulu? She doesn't fit in with the other kids. Maybe we shouldn't. She'll never know."
"No. I guess not. What would she do anyway? Besides that, Lulu might catch what she's got!"
A sad story indeed. This one has a better ending:
"Hey, you know who we forgot!?! Phoebe! What about Phoebe?"
"Oh my, garsh! How could we forget Phoebe!!! What were we thinking!?! Although... wait a minute...is she going to be able to participate in the skating part of the party? Remember... she has some special gear so I don't know how well that will work for her with skates."
"You're right. Maybe we should come up with a different party idea so she can participate too? She might feel funny sitting on the sidelines watching everyone else whizz by while she just sits there. She might get lonely!"
"We can't leave her out, the kids love her!!! Hey! I know! What about that new cupcakery around the corner?!"
"Awesome! I love it! Great idea! This is going to be a blast!"
The little "crippled" girl: A figment of the couples imagination who never materialized because she was forgotten. The parent's antiquated and archaic attitudes, language and actions toward others with disabilities her kept her weak and pathetic in their minds so they never allowed their little Lulu to be near her. The family never fully matured. The little girl on the other hand, is doing quite well...
Meet Phoebe (pronounced fee bee): A female with a congenital physical disability. It's nothing contagious, it's something she was born with, like her brown hair. With her mobility equipment at the ready, she's a girl on the go and always up for adventure. She doesn't let anything hold her back from having a great time! It's the WAY she is, not the "what" she is that makes this square bee stand out from the crowd! psst...(She reminds me a lot of my daughter!)
Stereotyping is what is wrong! It is detrimental to social development and holds people back. Don't let it happen in your household!
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